grrrrrrrr.....

Dear God,

         You know what... sometimes I feel like I am in the world by myself... no friends, no love, no social life (¿Dónde está mi novio, mi esposo, mi amor?), no pet, no fun...

I hate feeling like this... so I gotta pray and ask God to show me what to do... the funny thing is that I still ain’t sure where to look, but this does NOT shake my faith that God is there for me and I just need to be there for Him more... I cry... hard... but I'm not dead and I don’t plan on giving up anytime soon... or EVER!!

I was real close to my dream life and now... that I think back to those times… I want it back... I had a cute little apartment, a dog and my daughter... I don’t want to give up my dreams of owning a home... I just hate thinking that I won’t get one until I’m 60 years old!!

I am so scared of getting a job or even applying for jobs... I don’t think the employer will want me because I’m black and a woman and just not "slick" enough with my words... I need help... not the help that I have received from men and a few woman where they help me and I owe them my loyalty allegiance and life.

Why must credit be repaired so SLOWLY... the only way to truly fix it is to get a MUCH better paying job... but when I get it... will I HATE it???

Lord Jesus... have mercy on me, your little sister... Lord God have mercy on me... your daughter... help me find strength and determination and a path... or some kind of beacon signals...Help please    …cuz I KNOW only a miracle will do… is this that stuff that I learned about at church and those camp meetings? Where God allows situations to show HIS power and GLORY to those around me… so that they KNOW God did it??

 

Sincerely,

ShaTina =)