How in the world is is so hard to have child-like faith? At what age do you just stop believing? ...why are people excited and obliged to kill the hope nd wonder in children? You can have what you say? What should I be saying? What do I really want? Am I being selfish by wanting it? Should i be modest in my desires or truly express myself? Why do i often feel condemned when i speak to my patent? What is that about?
Well, here goes... What do I want? Fulfillment and satisfaction in my life. I want, for real, a truly powerful connection with God. I want to be God's friend. I want to... not just cuz I aint really around folk that much and can tend to be a bit of an introvert, but because... i have been hearing about how gifted I am... and i KNOW i am not using my gifts, or even aware of half of them. Like, what is it I am to be doing. I am a warrior with no battle, at times. I am bored and lazy in my mind, but that is not the realest, truest form of myself.
I want to love and be loved in return by a man of God with no mistress or girlfriends who can really have a true covenant relationship with me. I desire life, health, fun, music, exercise, travel, meaningful interactions, quality chill time, to be comfortably regimented. I don't want to waste my time any more with ungrateful folks/men who will never see my true value. I will not be diminished in speech or action by the man that I marry. I am not fully aware of our ministry, but God Will reveal it.
I don't want to be walking around in a haze oblivious to the move of God's spirit. Holy Spirit, i want us to be a team where you call and guide the shots. I will obey. I am a visionary and prophet of God who hears His voice and documents every word uttered to me.
I desire a life filled with color and pets and no bugs. I rebuke all distractions and time wasters that will try to attempt to block my destiny.
I want a two story home. No pool, full backyard, 2 persian/fluffy seal point cats, 2 puppies... yorkie/maltese. An all Black Jeep Wrangler.
